2011/03/27

Waving (again)

Well, it's happening. This week, it's happening. Young giant packing up his car to drive away and start a life that isn't here, isn't with us, isn't in my ears or eyes, isn't where I sense his presence as a kind of constant.

No one to whittle sticks on the front steps, or leave seriously muddied logger style boots in the way after a tramp in the woods. No one going up and down the stairs at very odd hours in the middle of the night, or alternating fascinatingly evocative guitar music with ... um ... well, whatever that other stuff is supposed to be. No one cluttering up the TiVo with weird movies or absurdly nutso talk show hosts ("you guys gotta see this!"), and no one eating the food I thought I'd have around for the whole week. No one to leave dishes on the coffee table and no one to do it when I say, "you do the kitchen tonight."

Two people's clothes in the wash now. Two people's dishes in the sink, and two people's reading material scattered across the living room. Two people for meals, two people for evenings, two people for conversation.

I'll be fine. No. Really. I will. I've got lots to do. Library work and school work and writing work and house work and walking and teaching and reading and cooking and dreaming and ...

wondering

when he'll be back.

Bye, son.


Love, Mom and Dad

4 comments:

Kathryn said...

Well, we are "two people" to for our whole lives. We aren't going to be blessed with children here on earth.

I know that doesn't help your "empty nest" feelings, maybe it is cruel for me to speak. It must be really lonely when you are used to more voices in a home and then they aren't there any more.

I hope it feels more comfortable for you in time.

And you get to look forward to his homecomings! : )

Stephanie said...

Well ... I'll tell you a secret, Kathryn. We are very attached to our kids. However, we exult in their amazing adulthoods, and while we have been happy to have our son here for about 3/4 of a year after college graduation, we also learned something while he was gone. We get used to the "just the two of us" life verrrry verrrry quickly. :-)

I know perfectly well that the sadness I feel again at his going will last me for a few hours or days, and then all of a sudden I'll remember what it is to have our house to ourselves, and I'll do exactly what you say. I'll look forward to his (and to his sister's and his brother's) homecomings. Life bring tears sometimes, but this - what he's doing now - it's good. It is as it should be.

Missy Hempe said...

Awwww, Stephanie! Hugs to you. I can't imagine what moms go through and quite frankly, the Virgin Mary probably wouldn't have been as sorrowful if she had remained childless!! It is the ultimate unselfish act to wave goodbye at the doorstep, and I love you for it.

Valerie said...

(((Stephanie))) Being a single mom and having my four daughters with me I can't imagine any of them being "gone". I know the day will come and I'll try to be brave.